I did some stand up last night and I'm not happy about it. I just wasn't present during my set, I was just saying the words. I hate when that happens.
I tried a couple of times to kick myself into the moment but it just didn't arrive. I was thinking more than I was simply letting go and performing; my comedic voice was not there, the rhythm to my thoughts and pace were no where to be found.
Part of the problem I was guarded and not vulnerable, had nearly zero connection with my own material and so definitely not with the audience.
I can hope this is a black hole I drop into maybe only every decade or so. It wasn't fun and it was all my fault. The audience was fine and the room was ok. It was all me and my lack of focus, concentration and willingness to simply let go.
I'll blame it on my biorhythms for now, I'm a child and so a victim of the Universe sometimes. But jeeeez.